My new website...

We should be up and running in the next 48 hours. Hope to see you there!

www.creativehearth.com

Something new for the new year...

I am so excited. I have been working on a website to be published very soon, and I can't wait to share it and promote it. I think it is going to be a lot of fun and just what I am looking for to begin the next part of my journey and maybe yours too : )

Reorganizing my thought process

Sitting with my baby boy who is sick again. I find I am either running around like a chicken without a head or sitting holding a crying baby. Leaving me with not much time to think or get done for me. All these ideas and creative endeavors I have late at night or while driving that at one time may have seemed possible to conquer are again put on the back burner. And so I sit here. I can either be depressed and victimize myself or I can be positive and reorganize my thinking. I had this time with Ayden for many many months to just sit and be with him. How often do I get the opportunity to just be with Quinn? And how often do I just sit and be. So I chose to slowly move around this morning. Not run to the market to pick up an item, or go to the mall to return gifts, or head over to starbucks for a much needed coffee (although that one would be nice : ) ) . I am here with my 9 month old son and tomorrow he won't be this age anymore. He will be a day older.

Beauty

In my yoga class this week, my amazing teacher lead us in a meditation where we held something beautiful close to our hearts. Whenever I was in a pose I found challenging or almost impossible to hold any longer I imagined this beautiful flower behind my heart. And there I was holding a pose I never thought I could do with a lot more ease and confidence. Today I found myself dealing with a challenging experience and I imagined the same flower behind my heart. Within moments I was able to move through the experience with a lot more compassion for myself and strength then I would have in the past.

My resolutions

To be Happy. To be Healthy physically and mentally. To embrace LOVE, LAUGHTER, and PASSION! To accept people for who they are, acknowledge their fears, and be kind yet aware. DO THINGS FOR ME!!!!! Remember and revel...I have all I need, and beyond that is true bliss. LOVE LOVE AND KEEP LOVE ALIVE! HAPPY 2010. I feel this is going to be a new year to a lot of inspiration and good times for all. XOXOXO truly, creative hearted

A matriarch

My family Tree

What is a matriarch? A mother, a leader, a role model, a strength, a believer...

It is so easy to get caught up in the "mommy/parenting world". I find I attempt to be someone else. Someone I see at the market, on t.v, in a book, at school, a friend, a blogger, or even my own parent. I don't want to be just another cookie cutter mom that I see so many of, and yet I admit I fall prey. I find myself obsessing over how I can be better then or as good as these other moms... have what they have for their kids, do what they do for their kids, or be who they are to their kids. Should I be working? Should I remain a stay at home mom? Should I have help? I feel as if I will never be able to provide enough for my children. I recognize this is not reality and that I am creating these issues for myself, and I see other moms struggle with this as well. It is like a black hole of destruction, causes more damage to us all rather then allowing ourselves to be the person we truly are. The one person we do know best and should trust best. Believe in our own selves. I can only be a true matriarch when I be me, and rise above all the bull shit I create. Then and only then do I notice this beautiful rippling effect it has on my children, husband, and everyone around me. No one is perfect. And no parent is perfect. We are inevitably going to screw up our kid some way or another, but that is what gives them character. When we lose our sense of selves by trying to be something we are not this only takes away our souls and our children's souls. I need to be reminded of this often and writing it here will reinforce this for me. I can look back on this post and be reminded to let go of all the bs and just be me. The matriarch I know I am.

Snow magnificent snow

Our first real snow day of the season. What to do? Take some photos of the boys frolicking and exploring another one of natures beauty.